Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Cartoon for May 29

It happens after every natural disaster: images of Jesus survive. It's a miracle--if you believe in a narcissistic God.

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21 comments:

  1. AnonymousMay 29, 2008 at 12:08 AM

    whatever

    Y_S

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  2. Barry DeutschMay 29, 2008 at 1:59 AM

    This made me laugh very hard.

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  3. Matt PMay 29, 2008 at 9:34 AM

    Spot on. These are the same people who ignore the frequent fatal church bus crashes.

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  4. MoeLarryAndJesusMay 29, 2008 at 9:57 AM

    When SuperChristians tell me that the "only way to heaven is through Jesus," I like to ask them, "How does that work, exactly? Do you crawl up his ass?"

    Great cartoon.

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  5. AngeloMay 29, 2008 at 1:13 PM

    I have a different take on this.

    1) Suburban household emits tons and tons of greenhouse gas into the air.

    2) Greenhouse gas exacerbates the hurricane season. (not to mention famine and death in Africa)

    3) Suburban household gets destroyed.

    He spared the statue as a way of telling people not to put statues of him anywhere near their evil lifestyles. Of course, he slaps his holy forehead when they see it as a sign that they should "rebuild".

    Hey wait, this ties into the 'elitist' thing we were discussing earlier. Since I favor unproven deities over humans, this makes me (and all religious people) the ultimate elitists.

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  6. AnonymousMay 29, 2008 at 4:11 PM

    When lightning strikes a Muslim prayer tower God is mad at them for preaching false testament. When lightning strikes some one on the street they have obviously led a life of sin. When lightning strikes in the middle of the forest Whom is God mad at. The deer?

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  7. AnonymousMay 29, 2008 at 4:35 PM

    How do you know it was Jesus, since we don't know what he looked like?

    Because it wasn't Elvis, so who else could it be?

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  8. AnonymousMay 29, 2008 at 4:48 PM

    I love this cartoon. Will it be available for sale?

    Angelo, do you comment on every single Ted Rall tidbit?

    Ted, did you have any thoughts on the Kennedy brain tumor?

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  9. AnonymousMay 29, 2008 at 5:14 PM

    Brilliant!

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  10. AnonymousMay 29, 2008 at 10:14 PM

    psssst Angelo.... There were hurricanes long before there were suburban households.

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  11. AngeloMay 30, 2008 at 9:29 AM

    do you comment on every single Ted Rall tidbit?

    Not nearly as often as you do, anonymous.

    There were hurricanes long before there were suburban households.

    Look up "exacerbate".

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  12. Ted RallMay 30, 2008 at 11:53 AM

    "Ted, did you have any thoughts on the Kennedy brain tumor?"

    Several right-wingers commented that they wished him all the best, despite hating him. For instance, Dr. Laura said "I don't have one good word to say about that man," then continued to say she felt bad he was ill.

    Hey, if they think he's evil and his pro-abortion stance makes him a baby killer, shouldn't they be happy?

    That's the difference between the right and the left. The right spends your whole life telling you that you're scum, a traitor, un-American. You get some tumor and then they pray for you. Or claim they do; I'd love to know whether those megachurch congregations really pray for TK when instructed to do so. My kingdom for a mindreader.

    Lefties, on the other hand, are honest. If we think you suck when you're alive, we think you suck when you're dead. And we say so.

    Speaking of which:

    The only problem with Reagan's death was that it didn't occur before he had a chance to ruin the country.

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  13. devilMay 30, 2008 at 12:41 PM

    "The only problem with Reagan's death was that it didn't occur before he had a chance to ruin the country."

    yeah, but reagan didn't ruin it-- the years '81-'89 were really just poppy bush's first two terms. ronnie was nothing more than a figurehead... a press laison, really. that doddering old fool wasn't capable of actually running ANYthing. the guy was so stupid, after all, that he had an astrologer scheduling his summit meetings for him. he was literally too goddamn dumb to be evil.

    of course, that didn't stop me from throwing a huge party when he died, with two kegs and a stripper (nicknamed "nancy" for the duration of her visit). i wore a rubber ronnie mask all night, and at the end of the party, after the cops shut us down, i burned it in the fireplace while my friends and i chanted "see you in hell! see you in hell! see you in hell!"

    i plan on doing the same to celebrate the deaths of poppy, chimpy, and dickface cheney. and ted, i know i live pretty far away from you (i'm in CA), but you're definitely invited. if nothing else, maybe i'll make a big carboard cut-out of you and prop it up in the corner so you can at least SORT of be there.

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  14. devilMay 30, 2008 at 12:50 PM

    and i DO know how to spell "liaison," dammit. stupid fingers...

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  15. AnonymousMay 30, 2008 at 1:43 PM

    Death to Reagan ?

    Y_S

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  16. AnonymousMay 30, 2008 at 1:50 PM

    PS Ted, I am currently on page 102 of "Wake Up, You're Liberal".

    You published that around 2004, and it clearly shows from its lack of vitriol against a second electoral theft and a lack of an index ;-)

    Personally I am trying to look for ways to adapt it to my situation in Pakistan. And helping out some Green friends in Canada. The latter too easy, the former, so hard. LOL


    Jokes aside, you mention "coolness" as a vital factor to allow the left to win elections. Despite his many flaws (you should know, you're constantly pointing them out) Obama conquers imagery. But how to finally steamroll the right and marginalise them permanently for the fascists they are? And as 2004 seems more like 8 years ago, do you have any additions/comments to this book you can add?

    Y_S

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  17. Aggie DudeMay 30, 2008 at 6:02 PM

    I think the baby boomer generation ruined this country, Ted. Reagan may have been old, but this country started going to the crapper when the baby boomers got old enough to really start getting involved.

    Sure there were a few idealistic hippies and stuff, but they really didn't have an impact. We won't start back on the right track (if ever) until their generation is out of office and stops voting.

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  18. AnonymousMay 30, 2008 at 10:26 PM

    Ah another vague global warming, I mean climate change answer.

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  19. AnonymousMay 31, 2008 at 7:35 AM

    I find it quite alarming, the fact that I want to party with THE DEVIL!!!!

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  20. AngeloJune 1, 2008 at 9:48 AM

    Devil, as Governor of California, Reagan took great pains to destroy a really good education system.
    It is possible to be evil and dumb at the same time. You were right to party when he croaked, and you should celebrate the anniversary as well. If you invite me, I will dressed up as a charbroiled nun to commemorate Reagan's central America policies. You can be Father Romero with the back of his head missing.

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  21. RussJune 2, 2008 at 11:47 AM

    Ted,
    You are one of the best journalistic writers that I am aware of. Keep up the fabulous effort. History just may appreciate it yet.

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